ConWatch: Week 1,797

Does Germany have a constitution yet?

Hey — so remember that time Germany tried to destroy Europe? No, not Hitler. Not everything is Hitler. All the time with the Hitler. Geez, such a one-track mind.

Much more recently, when the Merkel-Schäuble axis led the austerity attack on southern Europe, with a slash-and-burn campaign of these countries’ public sectors in exchange for bailouts because the currency these countries signed up for turned out to pose a real Sophie’s Choice.

Germany, meanwhile, profited handsomely. First, with the introduction of the euro to begin with, which made its exports that much more competitive; next, by expanding the euro to countries like Greece, giving Germany an even more dominant economic position and allowing its banks to more easily lend to fellow members of the currency club, which they could then use to buy stuff from Germany; and finally, by raking in all those sweet, sweet interest payments on the bailout loans.

We’re not saying that the German-dominated euro is a Ponzi scheme, but we’re also not saying it isn’t. We are definitely saying that the EU hasn’t been the same since.

Thankfully, the Germany that made the EU weaker due to its unresolved trauma from destroying Europe may soon get strangled to death by a Germany that wants to make the EU stronger by doing what it did to destroy Europe.

Greece be like: Oh, now you say so.

With the so-called feminist Greens getting ready to move out post-breakup, the Social Democrats are poised to jump into a not-so-grand bed with Christian Democrats led by a guy who, at least at one point in time, was OK with marital rape. In exchange, there may be piles of borrowed money on the way to make Germany great again.

For that to happen, there will need to be a vote to skirt Germany’s constitutional debt rules, if not amend them outright. While they’re at it, we humbly suggest, they could get themselves an actual constitution.

Even if they don’t, though, it’s already big of the Teutonic guardians of the debt brake to take a knee, clearing the path for the EU to ReArm™ itself like the shnorrer it was never allowed to be. Until now. The €800 billion figure cited for that purpose just happens to be the same that Mario Draghi thinks is the right amount for giving the single market the shot of competitiveness it needs.

Funny that.

As Germany can attest: Nothing pulls you out of the economic doldrums like spending for war. At a time of rising nationalism and militarism across Europe, what could go wrong?